Astrocartography© experience: I spent 2 weeks on my Saturn-IC line

I spent 2 weeks in the Republic of Congo and in the Democratic Republic of Congo back in April. I have quite a few lines going over Africa and when I saw that my Saturn-IC line was going right through both countries my first thought was "ouch". Then I remembered Saturn is not all bad even if it is considered to be a malefic planet.
Having a day chart and Saturn in its home sign of Aquarius seems to decrease the detrimental energy it can have on me because when I think about my Saturn return for example, it was not that bad. Nevertheless, it is a powerful planet we have a lot to learn from and I did learn quite a bit in a short amount of time.

Before sharing my experience, let's cover the basics.
What is Astrocartography©: it is a method created by Jim Lewis used in astrology to map out how planetary energies influence different geographical locations on Earth. It helps individuals understand how their astrological birth chart interacts with various places, potentially impacting their experiences and opportunities in different parts of the world.
What is Saturn: Roman God known as Cronos in Ancient Greek, Saturn in astrology is the planet associated with time, restriction/repression, structure, discipline, authority figures and maturity. Where you have Saturn is usually where you feel restricted, an area where you have to work harder and be more patient to see results.
What is the IC: it is a point not a planet. IC stands for Imum Coeli which means "bottom of the sky" in latin. It is the darkest place of the sky and the cusps of the 4th house (except in systems like whole sign). The 4H is family, roots, home/homeland and the maternal lineage. I see the IC as the most intimate part of us, our shadow.

I also wanted to share snippets of the meaning of the Saturn line and the Saturn (conjunct)-IC line taken from different sources.
Here are snippets of what Jim Lewis with Kenneth Irving says in the book "Psychology of Astro*Carto*Graphy":
About the Saturn line:
"If you have been drawn to this zone, it is symbolic of a need for deeper personal investigation of your darker side and hidden self. [..]This is a good place for hard work, but health and emotional levels are depressed, and problems of control intrude into most relationships."
"This zone works best for those whom happiness is not enough.[...] Accordingly, though in this location you will be tested by frustration, from the testing you emerge with knowledge of both your limitations and your actual powers. [...] Patience and wisdom come after long self-searching, and what is gained here is yours and yours alone, an inner fiber that less afflicted personalities will never appreciate. Disciplines, power, constructive material values, realism, resourcefulness, seriousness, self-denial, and control are perfected here, and others are expected to share or confirm your puritanical, melancholy point of view."
About the Saturn-IC line:
"The inner desert. This placement of Saturn tends to stress your relationship with your family and with the psychological concepts underlying your origins, your 'roots', and your inmost self-definition. [...] You can have a sense of bitterness and awareness regarding what you have missed in life but, on the positive side, this area is one in which you can center and focus yourself, finding inexhaustible reserves of inner power from which you can create a self-image that can weather any storm."

Snippet of what astro.com says about the Saturn-IC line:
"This is a place where you get plenty of opportunity to deal with your emotions. Your psychic and emotional states may exhibit tension, you may feel unsure. But this is a clear sign that you have to start dealing with these feelings and strive for understanding. Psychotherapy could be successful. Try to stabilise your emotional state and to overcome your emotional problems. This will have a positive effect not only on your personal but also your professional life."

Now that we covered the basics let's dive in.
First observation: I spent barely any time alone, I had no intimacy with myself.
It was a group trip with a travel agency. It was my first time travelling through a travel agency and my first time travelling with people I didn't know at all. I usually travel by myself. The whole trip we were 2 persons per room and as it was an organised group trip, most of the days we had activities planned so I was almost everyday from morning to night with one or multiple people.
We had free days, where we could do whatever we wanted but I didn't use this time to be by myself, I used most of those days to do other activities with a couple of the girls. It's only on the last day, feeling exhausted, that I decided to not do anything and to be by myself.
If I ever travel with a group again, I will make sure to take time for me because chile... I burnt myself out! Never doing that mistake again, FOMO is going to the trash.

Second observation: I repressed (Saturn) parts of myself (IC).
The first one being my spirituality. Most of the people on this trip were christians and I am not a religious person. During this trip I didn't talk about astrology (which is ruled by Aquarius/Uranus) nor human design or other esoteric subjects. I also didn't consume any content on those topics which is super surprising because astrology is a passion of mine (obviously). I was so shocked when I realised that. Yes I didn't have the occasion to talk about any of those topics because I quickly understood that I wasn't surrounded by people interested in them but the fact that I didn't even watch a video or read something about astrology on my free time is really surprising.
The other part of myself that was restricted was my funny goofy side. On the relocation chart my IC is in Aquarius and one of the words that is often used to describe Aquarius is eccentricity. In this environment that inner part of me was restricted. I didn't do it on purpose obviously, there were just no occasions for me to be goofy or eccentric, there were already very funny people on that trip who shined more in that department. But I do think it is also related to the next point...

Third observation: I felt (IC) separated (Saturn) from the group (Aquarius).
And here the word "felt" is very important. The 4H is a very intimate and personal house, it is the house ruled by the Moon which is the planet representing our emotions and our intuitive mind. I felt left out and clueless sometime but if you ask the other girls of the trip, they will probably tell you that they saw me, that I was fully part of the group.
Why did I feel excluded? I was the only person of Caribbean descent on the trip, everyone was African, 75% of the group were congolesses going to Congo for the first time. Even if it wasn't my first time in Africa, I still felt the culture gap. Not knowing anything about the Congolese culture, I didn't understand most of the references they were referring to during the trip. So when pretty much everyone was laughing, I was trying to understand what the laugh was about. I wasn't sad about it, it just reminded me of the next observation...

Forth observation: I've been reminded how cut off (Saturn) of my culture (IC) I am.
The 4H is roots and family, therefore it also represents your culture. My family is from a Caribbean island called Guadeloupe (not Guadalupe). Colonised last by the French it is today a department/county of France, so I and my family are French. I was born and raised in France. I understand the Creole of my island but don't speak it, I don't cook Caribbean food, I don't know the full story of the island my family is from, I don't have a strong attachment to my Guadeloupean culture; in true Saturn in the 4H natally (I use placidus). Those women who for the most part were going for the first time in their family's country, knew so much about their culture. Most of them could talk Lingala (the main language of those countries) even if it wasn't fluent and they knew a lot of the history of their country, you could tell their parents talked to them about the country even if they didn't encourage them to go see it for various reasons mostly safety. I felt shame for not knowing my culture so well. But what to do with that shame, how can I transmute it? Should I just accept that it is the promise of my chart and that there will always be a disconnect?

Fifth observation: I felt more intensely low vibrational emotions.
Like frustration, envy and disdain. I was the most surprised at the envy part.
I received praised for my style, my beauty, my maturity and my wisdom during this trip, yet when I was complimented, even if I was thanking the person, I wasn't taking in the empowerment because I was too focused on what was "missing" in me that was present in the others. It made me realise that I still strive for perfection and it confirmed that I still seek men's validation meaning I still center men because why receiving compliments from fellow black women wasn't enough? And I know why I do the correlation. Long story short, the people from the travel agency who were with us were 2 men. One of them I found cute and wanted to get to know a little bit more but I am not a person who approaches people which as a projector is aligned as I am supposed to be invited. Quickly, I noticed another girl in the group getting closer to him and even if they were acting like nothing was happening everybody on the trip knew something was happening between them. Envy showed up as me being more distant with that woman, never rude and never mean because she looks like a great person, we actually have similar characters, she was laughing at my goofiness and I appreciated a caring energy. Not surprisingly, I didn't change my behavior toward the man, I still teased and chatted with him when I could, without trying to win him over though. I haven't felt that envious in a long time and didn't know it was still something I could feel so intensely and this brings me to my last observation...

Sixth observation: I still have shadow work to do and maturity to acquire.
I understand that feeling low vibrational emotions is normal, I am a human being who will never be perfect (what is perfection anyway?). However, I can decide what I do with those emotions and how I act upon feeling them. When it comes to envy, I think I handled it well. I acknowledged the feeling, understood where it was coming from and I will dive deeper into this to change my focus. Regarding the frustration and disdain I felt during the trip, I have more work to do because I've been harsh and cold with people. I could find an excuse and say "I can't be friends with everyone and they were simply not for me" or say "I have a Virgo stellium I will always be critical" but I still could have handled things differently. It actually was probably more damaging to me than to them because it was too much energy spent on negative thinking. My brain is my gift and being bitter is my not self as a Projector in Human Design so this is confirmation that I was not in alignment. Can it also be that being in group settings is not for me? Yes, projectors do better in 1 to 1 settings and having my moon in the 7H reinforces that but knowing that, I have to find mechanisms to stay in integrity.

All in all, Saturn really challenged me on this one but it is for my own good, Saturn wants you to be the best version of yourself you can be. More things would have probably come up if I would have stayed on that line longer because the Saturn-IC combination can show up in so many other ways. It was only a fragment.
Will I do another group trip again? I don't know but if I do I will definitely handle it differently. Will I do another trip on a Saturn line? I don't know, the other lines fall in places that I am not that interested in visiting.
Seeing how the energy on that line applied to me when I spent just 2 weeks there is fascinating. Since I came back, I got sick and I am taking longer to recover than usual, looks like Saturn is still delaying things for me... I guess it is its way to still challenge me and teach me. Saturn is about discipline (Old French from Latin disciplina ‘instruction, knowledge’, from discipulus (see disciple)), It teaches you lessons for the long game.
I soon will embark on a journey to another line and this time I will stay way longer there so it's going to be very interesting. Teaser: it's going to be Neptunian...

One last thing: #FreeCongo #FreeHumanity

Food for thoughts.

Kathy